Piss on Week 2.8.11

Warning!! No one in the following post is actually being pissed on. It is simply an expression meant to describe how outrageous and unforgivable the actions of the following people really are. Anyone who finds this segment offensive automatically gives me the right and the duty to piss on them as well.


10. Uncle Luke


The Miami rapper whose hit songs include “Doo Doo Brown” and “Pop That Couchie” is now running for mayor of Miami’s Dade County.

He gets pissed on for thinking that his popularity among strippers will be enough to swing the voting community.




9. Delaware County Court


A 16 year-old high school wrestler was recently placed in protective custody by the Delaware County Courts because he and his family refused steroid treatment for a spinal cord injury.

Its ironic how an athlete can get locked up for using steroids, but you can lose your child for not forcing him to take them… Pissed On


8. Chad Ochocinco


The football player and reality TV star is once again changing his last name. He’s going back to his roots and has decided to be called Chad Johnson once again.

Chad Ochocinco..I mean Johnson..or whatever the hell he wants to be called now gets pissed on for worrying about the name on the back of his jersey when he should be focused on the fact that he didn’t make the Pro Bowl this year.

7. YouTube


Imagine that someone emails you a YouTube video that they found hilarious. You go to check out the link, only to find out that the video has been removed. I understand there are licensing issues but damn!

I’m giving YouTube the business for getting peoples hopes up for a video they can’t watch.


6. Meatheads


Whenever I’m in the gym there is always a guy bench pressing 400 pounds wearing a medium tee shirt. He needs to make sure that everyone knows that he works out. I’m giving the business to the people in the gym who grunt, growl, and throw weights for attention.


5. Jadakiss


Jada is by far one of my favorite rappers. His lyrical wordplay about a life of luxury and designer clothes makes you feel like you are on a shopping spree at Neiman Marcus. The problem is I never see him wearing these extravagant articles of clothing. He gets pissed on for talking about Louis Vuitton and Prada when we only see him in Champion hoodies and Nike boots.


4. Yao Ming Fans


Despite playing just five games this season due to injury, Yao Ming fans have once again voted him a starter in this year’s NBA All-Star game. This isn’t kick ball! You can’t pick somebody because you like them. Yao’s diehard fans get pissed on for picking their favorite player as opposed to the most deserving guy.

3. Pink Guns

I’m sorry but I can’t take someone with a pink gun seriously. Guns should be silver or black and that’s it. I’m pissing on the fact that I’ll probably die of laughter before getting shot with a gun the same color as cotton candy.


2. Pennsylvania Lottery


The PA lottery claims that the proceeds go to older Pennsylvanians. Well I buy a lot of scratch off tickets and I know a lot of older people who live in PA.

The lottery gets pissed on for not cutting my grandparents a check.


1. Robert J. Michelson


Anyone who has ever smoked marijuana has asked a dumb question or two, but this one tops them all. Robert Michelson called 9-1-1 to ask a simple, dumb ass question: How much trouble can you get into for growing marijuana?

He gets pissed on for calling 9-1-1 when he could have just used Wikipedia and avoided jail time.