Piss on Week 11.10.11

Warning!! No one in the following post is actually being pissed on. It is simply an expression meant to describe how outrageous and unforgivable the actions of the following people really are. Anyone who finds this segment offensive automatically gives me the right and the duty to piss on them as well.

Sincerely,

Professional Rationalist

10. 50 Cent

No this wasn’t a Halloween costume. 50 Cent really went and got braids in 2011.

He gets the business for thinking that just because he has money he won’t get pissed on for getting vintage Iverson braids .

9. Lindsey Iglesias and Lee Brooks


These two knuckleheads recently committed 8 burglaries inside of the Donovan Smith mobile home park. They stole flat screens, video game systems and allegedly found time to take a nap in one of the houses they robbed.

That’s right! This fake ass Bonnie and Clyde get pissed on for sleeping on the job.

8. People Who Can’t Park

One of my neighbors drives a Mini Cooper and she never fails to take up two parking spots. Despite the fact that she could probably fit her miniature vehicle through her front door, she always takes up a space big enough for an SUV.

This chick and anyone else who doesn’t understand the concept of one car equals one parking spot gets “wet up.”

7. JetBlue

A flight from Miami to New Jersey should only take a few hours. So imagine how frustrated JetBlue passengers where when they were stranded on a plane for 7 hours due to technical difficulties.

JetBlue gets pissed on for having those people on the plane all day and only having soda and pretzels for them to eat.


6. Nick Cannon

It’s been a while since Nick Cannon has made my list, but once I heard this song I had to welcome him back.



Nick the Quick gets pissed on for not realizing that the only thing he ever pimped was Nickelodeon.



5. Michael Zuk


Pictured above is the tooth of Beetle John Lennon, which Michael Zuk purchased for $31,000. http://www.cnn.com/2011/11/05/world/europe/uk-lennon-tooth-auction/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

Michael Zuk gets pissed on for playing Tooth Fairy and spending so much cash on a rotten tooth.

4. Unemployment Benefits

I was reading the news the other day and I came across and pitiful statistic..Only 48% of unemployed people are receiving benefits because most people have exhausted their 99 weeks of eligibility.

If people can’t find a job in 99 weeks, I think the system has to be pissed on. Wouldn’t you agree?

3. Pet Hippopotamus

I’ve always wanted a pet white tiger and people look at me like I’m crazy when I say it. Well if I can’t have a white tiger than it’s no way this chick can have a pet hippo.



Out of all the exotic pets someone could grab, choosing a hippo definitely gets this chick pissed on.

2. Texting Bride

Imagine after years of nagging you finally decide to bite the bullet and marry your girl, and this is what she does at the alter.




This chick gets pissed on for feeling that she immediately had to change her status to married on Facebook. The shake before the zip goes to the groom for not calling the whole thing off right then and there.

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Otherwise you join the list of people that have been pissed on!